This week a few people have asked me what my secret is for dealing with the challenges life seems to be throwing my way. They’ve been privy to some of my personal challenges and are baffled because I just seem to keep going despite the hurdles.
I feel a huge responsibility and burden when people make such comments because on the one hand I seem to project positivity and calm but my family know the truth. Each challenge hits me hard – I have learnt to recover quickly as a damage control mechanism.
The reason I feel a burden because I don’t want anyone to feel a bit low or challenged by the challenges they are going through; to feel weak or that there was something wrong with them.
We all have bad days irrespective of how successful you are.
Psychology and emotions have nothing to do with success – business, financial or otherwise.
My secret if there is any at all is to
1. Keep people, particularly the negative ones from getting into my mind. I believe my daily practice of filling my mind with positive encouraging words and motivational speeches has been vital to building resilience. Infact, most morning by the time I get to the office, I feel so pumped I literally feel I can fly. Its amazing what words can do for you.
2. I’ve learnt that people don’t do things to me. I’ve come to understand that the way people behave towards me is more a reflection of their internal world and the challenges they are going through rather than a personal attack at me. I strongly believe that anyone who has “wronged” me will most likely behave the same way given the same situation but involving someone else. They are just playing out their internal scripts and I just happen to feature in it, so I’m not a victim. This way of thinking is liberating, a lesson picked up from Eckhart Tolle’s books.
3. Last but not least, I also have a strong overriding belief that no one incident or person can change my destiny. Some of the things happening are all preparing me, teaching me much needed lessons for a better future. So why sweat the small stuff? I choose to learn what I can from every challenge no matter how bad and then I move from it as quickly as I can.
But mostly I feel blessed because I’ve come a long way. I know people from my childhood who didn’t have a chance because of the circumstances they were born in. I also feel blessed because I have good health and an amazing family. I know a lot of people who are struggling because they lack both.
So, I keep a journal where I remind my self of all the things I have to be grateful for and I choose to hold on to that.
It’s all in the mind. Protect yours.
What’s your coping mechanism? Or try one of mine and let me know how it feels at the end of the day? Wishing you well.